A Return To My First Love…
“It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight.”
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I have always loved to write.
Ever since I learned how to string words together in a way that makes sense (first to myself and then to others).
My answer to that silly question “If you could only take three things with you to a deserted island, what would they be?”
First, this would be such a dream come true. I might end up living on a deserted island or in the middle of the woods someday.
My answer is a journal, a pen, and tea.
Don’t judge me you fellow Christian friends. The Lord is Omnipresent so He’s with me wherever I go. LOL.
I digress.
Writing helps me process things and it also allows me to express my thoughts and ideas in the best, most precise way possible.
Writing can also be a weapon of mass destruction when I am hurt/mad, so I will first journal the immediate feelings that come over me. Once the venom is out of my system — because that is what it usually is, venom. Then and only then can I have a conversation with the “offender”.
I know.
Words can build or break. Words can “kill” — a person’s confidence or will. So I try to be very intentional and careful with my words.
You’re probably wondering where I am going with this ode to writing. Please stick with me.
But First…
One of the worst things you can ever do to yourself is to compare yourself to other people, especially about something that’s dear to you.
I can tell you this confidently because that’s what I did with my writing years ago and that’s how I ended up giving it up for another number of years.
Public writing I mean.
I came from daily Facebook notes, poetry (that I actually performed) and blogging when blogs were a thing, to only writing in my journal — when I remembered.
It was the most painful break because writing truly is my raison d’etre. I believe my life’s purpose is wrapped up in my writing.
And so, I let comparison — which is a robber of joy — separate me from something I enjoyed and loved. And because I left it too long, it’s been feeling very weird getting back together — with writing I mean. You’re still following, right?
My perfectionist alter-ego doesn’t help matters much.
Making me feel like I am not ready (lie because no one is ever 100% ready to do anything) or that I am not worthy to share my thoughts with you (like who do I think I am — another lie). Are you noticing a trend here?
Perfectionism is full of lies.
It thrives on your fear of potential failure which is the work of your ego because failing is as human as breathing is. So, get with it.
But yeah, I’ve been doing a lot of reading and prepping and just consuming information about writing when the truth of the matter is, the only way to get back in the ring is by actually getting in the ring.
So here I am.
Reacquainting myself with my first love.
Looking to get back the rhythm we once shared or create a new one.
Hoping that you will enjoy the ride and get inspired to get back to whatever it may be that you once loved but left because you thought you were not good enough.
xoxo,
adoyo’s musings
P.S. If you’re new here, hi.
I’m Adoyo, the writer behind adoyo’s musings. I’m a big tea fan and salsa dancing. I enjoy inspiring, motivating, empowering and making others laugh (when I can). I also like to challenge the status quo about things. I’m low (high) key opinionated while also being a great listener, an empath and an idealist (to a fault). My faith is my anchor and foundation and truly the wind beneath my wings. Nice to meet you.
